Because an algorithm will never let you find love, not even on Valentine’s Day

Because an algorithm will never let you find love, not even on Valentine's Day

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Between the words I love you there is not a pink apostrophe, but an abyss. To fill it, humanity has invented everything: spells, tricks, prayers, and for some time now even algorithms.

The offer

There are numerous options to choose from when it comes to dating apps. There are general apps that target a wider audience, like Tinder and Bumble, but also others that focus on specific niches, like Grindr for LGBTQ+ people or Hinge for serious relationship seekers. The idea is simple: to analyze a series of parameters that define the personality of those who aspire to find a partner and to search the widest possible database for a person who matches that profile. The problem is how to do it. The algorithms of love are always different, they are patented and are very complex (on some sites they can evaluate hundreds of parameters), but in general they work according to three main criteria: similarity, complementarity, importance. You need to be similar enough to find commonalities, different enough to be able to share tasks and interests, and be able to prioritize what is important to share and what to keep to yourself.

Such a calculation is certainly not easy, but over the years, with the collection of data in ever greater quantities, and above all with the possibility of processing them in more depth, the formula of love should be almost infallible. Yet there are many reasons why dating algorithms don’t work as expected.

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The formula

First, they are based on data provided by users. This data may include information about your personality, interests and preferences. However, users can provide inaccurate or misleading answers, which means that the algorithms don’t have an accurate understanding of who the people they’re trying to match really are.

Secondly, dating algorithms do not take human dynamics into account. Love and relationships cannot be quantified and reduced to mathematical equations. People are complex and unpredictable, and cannot be matched simply based on their interests or preferences.

Furthermore, dating algorithms tend to perpetuate stereotypes and prejudices. For example, they may overestimate the importance of superficial characteristics such as physical appearance and underestimate the importance of empathy and understanding. This can lead to matches that aren’t truly compatible in the long run.

Again, love algorithms fail to take into account the changing nature of human relationships. People and their interests can change over time, and a formula can’t keep up with those changes. This means that a relationship that seems like a perfect match at first may not stand the test of time.

The curiosity

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The case

The success of a platform depends on its algorithm, and this success must be defined in some way. The least that can be asked is that the percentage of couples that are formed because they are combined by a mathematical formula is higher than those that are born by chance. But this is not always the case, as Gerd Gigerenzer notes in Why human intelligence still beats algorithms, soon to be published by Raffaello Cortina.

Psychologist and director of the Harding Center for Risk Literacy at the University? from Potsdam, Gigerenzer observes that algorithms fail because they are mathematical formulas applied to the world of feelings. “Complex algorithms work best in well-defined, stable situations where large amounts of data are available. Human intelligence, on the other hand, has evolved to handle uncertainty regardless of the amount of data available,” he writes. In short, artificial intelligence offers extraordinary potential and achieves excellent results, but only in certain areas, those where the rules are precise, well-known and stable. For everything else, i.e. the choices that change our lives, the intuitions that open up new horizons for us, the intermittences of the heart, it is better to rely on Valentine’s Day.

The alarm

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