at least 250 couples a year, but 9 out of 10 are heterosexual – Corriere.it

NoThere aren’t certain numbers in Italy on children of same-sex couples awaiting recognition. And not even those already recognized. Since 7 July, when the Municipality of Milan resumed registering at birth both parents of children born within same-parent couples, 38 registrations have been made. The vast majority concern mothers: mostly of boys and girls born in Italy after the mothers have carried out heterologous assisted fertilization in the countries where it is legal, but also of children born abroad in countries that recognize thesame parenting. About a third of the Milanese transcripts, on the other hand, concern children of two fathers with surrogate motherhood, but not a photograph of those born in the past six months: it also includes those born in past years who up to now (unlike the children of two mothers) had not been transcribed and which are retrieved later from the registry office.

The proportions

There is a clear empirical fact: in general there are many more mothers than fathers, with an estimated ratio of 9 to 1. Couples of women can undergo heterologous fertilization abroad, a procedure now easily accessible in Europe, and then give birth in Italy. In order to have children, gay fathers have to resort to surrogacy, which is an extremely expensive (as well as contested) procedure and therefore precluded to most, and they can do it only in Canada and the United States, the only two countries where gestation for others is legal for non-resident male couples. The fact that children of same-sex couples are not registered depends on the absence of a law to recognize them: at the registry office they are mostly registered as children of a single mother, or more than one single father.

The wrong numbers

A figure circulating these days of 150,000 children of same-sex couples awaiting recognition. But a wrong number. It is based on an improper interpretation of a research carried out in 2005 by Arcigay with the patronage of the Higher Institute of Health which showed that 17.7% of gays and 20.5% of lesbians over 40 have offspring . If all age groups are considered, one gay or one lesbian out of 20 is a parent. Projecting these percentages onto the Italian gay and lesbian population (a figure that is in evolution, however, because it increases with the decrease in homophobia), we arrive at an estimate of 100,000 children, who according to some would be 150,000 today. But this calculation says nothing about children born into a same-sex couple waiting to have their parents recognized: says how many people are likely to have a parent who at some point in their life identifies as gay, lesbian or bisexual. Nor are there reliable data on parents through surrogacy, of any sexual orientation. Also in this case empirical estimates calculate that they are at least a surrogate 250 pairs a yearof which 90 percent are heterosexual.

The travels

Gay couples seem to be more numerous because they are immediately recognisable: when there are two fathers, given that adoption is precluded for same-sex couples, it is clear that the children were born via surrogacy (in many European countries it is possible for gay fathers to adopt but you have to live there for years and this cuts out almost all Italians). Heterosexual couples who resort to surrogacy do everything to hide, for fear of having their children taken away, even if for years now the trials open in this regard have concluded that the fact that surrogacy is illegal in Italy is not a reason to take them away from their parents. The favorite destination for heterosexual couples for surrogacy used to be Ukraine, and remains to some extent despite the war. Next comes Greece (both of which do not accept gay couples). Parents usually go to those countries and return with a Ukrainian or Greek birth certificate that lists them as the father and mother of the child born a few weeks earlier, with nowhere indicating that it was born by a surrogate mother.